Needle Biopsy

June 29th (oops wrong date previous journal) I headed to the hospital for this routine test. Actually, night before I fought with my mom telling her not to come with me and I'd be fine to go on my own..(what can I say I'm a stubborn pig headed independant) Well she ended up coming and we waited. What I was told was the Doctor would come and do me inbetween his operations. I ended up waiting only 15 minutes before he came down. I lied down and was told that this really was probably only a stalling thing and I would still have to have surgery..I just assumed he really wanted to cut me open *GRIN* REMEMBER The WAITING ROOM WHERE MY MOM WAS IS DIRECTLY ACROSS FROM THE OPERATING ROOM I WAS IN*** He stuck the needle in and took one sample my face went screwed..I just love needles *SARCASM* when he placed it in.....took it out....then he took another needle (thanks to the nurse lol) and took a second sample. When he placed the gause on my neck I could hear him yelling we're loosing him we're loosing him...I couldn't help laughing then I told him that my mom was in the waiting room and did he really want her to come rushing in there to see what's going on. He told me that was all and as I started to get up and he threw the needle out he sat there and told me..."You know we're probably dealing with Hodkins here** BFRDvsarijdnv That's all I could remember that's all I could hear and and feel nothing my life just stopped everything was slowing down and I was clentching my teeth trying to hold back the tears..I shook my head as aknowledgment and left the room...not wanting to worry my mom I put on a front. I went to grab her and there she was standing in the door way of the waiting room...not more then 5 feet away. She asked me what the doctor said and I told her..How we should od a show on tv with surgery and and naked nurses (this is true he said that when he first came in). I refused to tell her anything else as she would worry. Then she walked up to the door with the doctor and asked to speak to him. She asked what he had just told me and he said about the show...My mom was like yes I heard that, what else did you tell him..he looked at me for confirmation he could say somehting but I was motionless...I looked at my mom and the look she gave him was enough so he said that we are probably dealing with Hodgkins here. The look on my mom's face was enough to make me just want to give in. But I couldn't I felt if I got upset my mom would too...so I bit down on my tongue harder and we left the hospital. Walking to the car my mom then got crazy..told me I had to start eating better and tsking better care of myself and vitamins...I htink she was still in denial. I was told to check back with them on July 2nd for any results. I can honetly say I have never cried so much on my way to work I just couldn't believe this was happening..it all felt like a bad dream. And the waiting now begins